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I think Lizzie was also taken aback by the furnishings and fittings that she found in her new quarters, which were probably of a much higher standard than anything that she had ever known before. She almost gasped as she sat on the edge of the bed and sunk into the depths of the mattress. There was also a large freestanding wardrobe made of attractively figured and polished wood, an equally well-made dressing table with drawers and a large mirror, together with an upholstered stool to sit on, plus, marvel-of-marvels, her own hand basin with plumbed-in taps, supplying cold and hot water! Lizzie also knew about bathrooms with inside lavatories, of course; she’d just never stayed anywhere that had one—and now there was one apparently for her sole use only feet from her bedroom! So no more getting up on a cold winter’s morning and having to go out into the yard to use the privy!“This is almost perfect—the only thing missing is a man tae keep me warm at night! D’ya think that there’s any. ’Me: ‘Sure. How much is that?’Bartender: ‘$8.00.’Me: ‘Here you are. OK now, what’s the wifi password?’Bartender: ‘ “youneedtobuyadrinkfirst”; No spaces and all lowercase.’----Prince Harry’s Bachelor Party - Quote of the DayIt’s really weird stuffing money into a stripper’s G string when every bill has a photo of your grandmother printed on it.”Compliments of technomageUnitarian Universalist jokesQ: What do you get when you cross a UU with a Jehovah’s Witness?A: Someone who knocks on your door for no apparent reason.You May Be A Unitarian Universalist If... you think socks are too formal for a Summer serviceyou think the Holy Trinity is “reduce, reuse and recycle”when you watch Jaws you root for the shark (“Hey, sharks have to eat too!”)you think “Whatever” is a valid theological pointyou think a Holy day of Obligation is your turn to bring coffee hour treatsyou know at least two people who are upset that trees had to die for your church to be built.Q: What is a Unitarian.
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